23 January 2010

Funny Quotes About Chocolate

From Denny: Here it is - All the funny quotes about chocolate I have found so far and given a home here at Romancing The Chocolate blog!

* Bumper sticker: If they don't have chocolate in Heaven, I'm not going!

* Nobody knows the truffles I've seen. - Anonymous

* Money talks; chocolate sings! - Anonymous

* Chocolate doesn't make the world go around ... but it certainly makes the ride worthwhile! - Anonymous

* Put "eat chocolate" at the top of your list of things to do today. That way, at least you'll get one thing done. - Anonymous

* In the beginning, the Lord created chocolate, and he saw that it was good. Then he separated the light from the dark, and it was better. - Anonymous

* Life without chocolate is weird like a beach without water. It's just plain unnatural! - Denny Lyon

* "Las cosas claras y el chocolate espeso." (Ideas should be clear and chocolate thick.) - Spanish proverb

* Exercise is a dirty word. Every time I hear it, I wash my mouth out with chocolate. - Anonymous

* Man cannot live by chocolate alone but it sure is fun trying! - Anonymous

* There's nothing better than a good friend, except a good friend with chocolate. - Anonymous

* I would give up chocolate but I'm no quitter. - Anonymous

* In the cookies of Life, friends are the chocolate chips. - Anonymous

* There is no such group as Chocolates Anonymous; no one wants to quit! - Anonymous


"The Spanish ladies of the New World are madly addicted to chocolate, to such a point that, not content to drink it several times each day, they even have it served to them in church. This sensuality has often brought down upon them the wrath of their bishops; but the latter have ended by closing their eyes to sin, and the Reverend Father Escobar, whose spiritual reasoning was as subtle as his moral doctrine was accommodating, issued a formal declaration that chocolate made with water was not contrary to the rule of the fast days, even evoking (to the profit of his penitents), the time worn adage, Liquidum non frangit jejunium."

- Jean Anthelme Brillat-Savarin (1755-1826), The Physiology of Taste

From RTC reader Joann Vallo and fellow blogger friend of women's issues: "I meditate, I do yoga, and I have a lot of friends who are healers...and if none of that works, I go buy a chocolate bar and a bottle of cognac." - Susan Strasberg

"After about 20 years of marriage, I'm finally starting to scratch the surface of what women want. And I think the answer lies somewhere between conversation and chocolate." - Mel Gibson

"All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt." - Charles M. Schulz

"Anything is good IF it's made of chocolate." - Jo Brand

"I am not a strict vegan, because I'm a hedonist pig. If I see a big chocolate cake that is made with eggs, I'll have it." - Grace Slick

* Look, there's no metaphysics on earth like chocolates. - Fernando Pessoa

* Forget love - I'd rather fall in chocolate! - Sandra J. Dykes

* I never do any television without chocolate. That's my motto and I live by it. Quite often I write the scripts and I make sure there are chocolate scenes. Actually I'm a bit of a chocolate tart and will eat anything. It's amazing I'm so slim. - Dawn French

* I owe it all to little chocolate donuts. - John Belushi

* I reckon I tried everything on the old apple, but salt and pepper and chocolate sauce topping. - Gaylord Perry

I was handed a chocolate bar and an M-1 rifle and told to go kill Hitler. - Jack Kirby

* Ice cream was my undoing, and six chocolate milk shakes in a row were nothing to me at one time. - Kate Smith

* It's about avoiding reality through various escape routes that become addictions and lead to Hell. My character is addicted to television, chocolate, coffee, to her dream of her son, which has no basis in reality. - actress Ellen Burstyn

* Most men, no matter how well or badly dressed, carry overstuffed, beat up wallets that should have been replaced years ago. Why is that? Every time I see a guy take out a wallet anywhere, it looks like a piece of old melted chocolate cake-with strings. - Jonathan Carroll

* Number one, I absolutely love making chocolate chip cookies. I mean, it's fun. It's exciting. Beyond the fact that I love making them, I love eating them. successful cookie company owner Debbi Fields

* People get so in the habit of worry that if you save them from drowning and put them on a bank to dry in the sun with hot chocolate and muffins they wonder whether they are catching cold. - John Jay Chapman

* Researchers have discovered that chocolate produces some of the same reactions in the brain as marijuana. The researchers also discovered other similarities between the two but can't remember what they are. - Matt Lauer, NBC Today Show host

* Venice is like eating an entire box of chocolate liqueurs in one go. - Truman Capote

* You know an odd feeling? Sitting on the toilet eating a chocolate candy bar. - George Carlin

* Strength is the capacity to break a chocolate bar into four pieces with your bare hands - and then eat just one of the pieces. - Judith Viorst

* Your face makes my soul want to eat chocolate pudding! - Andy Milonakis

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